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精彩对白：
- Captain of the Guards : Yep, that's catnip...
- Captain of the Guards: Yep, that's catnip...
- Cedric: Can I help you, your majesty?
- Cedric: That would be the dog's breakfast, your majesty.
- Chef: Bon appetit!
- Donkey : I don't *feel* any different. Do I look anydifferent?
- Donkey : I don't wanna die...! I don't wanna DIE! Oh sweetsister mother of mercy... I'm melting...! I'm MEEELTIIING!
- Donkey : I mean, how good looking could this Prince Charmingguy be anyway?
- Donkey : I'm a stallion, baby!
- Donkey : I'm coming Elizabeth!
- Donkey : It looks like you most certainly am are.
- Donkey : It's the old Keebler place!
- Donkey : Let's neuter him right now! Give him the Bob Barkertreatment!
- Donkey : Look out, Shrek, he got a piece!
- Donkey : Oh, don't feel bad, Shrek. Almost everybody who meetsyou wants to kill you.
- Donkey : Oh, Shrek. Don't worry. Things just seem bad becauseit's dark and rainy and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman towhack you.
- Donkey : Ooh, I love Mexican food!
- Donkey : Pray for mercy, from Puss!
- Donkey : Say something crazy... like you're wearing ladiesunderwear.
- Donkey : Shrek and I drank this potion and it made ussexy!
- Donkey : Then this fool went off and had a party, and they allstarting trying to pin a tail on me. Then they all got drunk, andstarted hitting me with sticks, yelling "Piñata! Piñata!" What thehell is a piñata, anyway?
- Donkey : You're supposed to say "You have the right to remainsilent!". No one said I have the right to remain silent!
- Donkey : [after turning back into a donkey] Aaaaaaw.
- Donkey : [carriage runs over Donkey] Oh, God! help me, please!My racing days are over! I'm blind! I'm blind! Tell the truth. WillI ever be able to play the violin again?
- Donkey : [final line during the extra part in the credits] I'mgoing to have to get a job.
- Donkey : [happily] Donkey!
- Donkey : [repeatedly] Are we there yet?
- Donkey : [running ahead of giant gingerbread man] Run, run asfast as you can!
- Donkey : [to Puss-in-Boots] The position of annoying talkinganimal has been filled.
- Donkey : [to Puss] If we ever need an expert on lickingourselves, we'll give you a call.
- Donkey: I don't *feel* any different. Do I look anydifferent?
- Donkey: I don't wanna die...! I don't wanna DIE! Oh sweetsister mother of mercy... I'm melting...! I'm MEEELTIIING!
- Donkey: I mean, how good looking could this Prince Charming guybe anyway?
- Donkey: I'm a stallion, baby!
- Donkey: I'm coming Elizabeth!
- Donkey: It looks like you most certainly am are.
- Donkey: It's the old Keebler place!
- Donkey: Let's neuter him right now! Give him the Bob Barkertreatment!
- Donkey: Look out, Shrek, he got a piece!
- Donkey: Oh, don't feel bad, Shrek. Almost everybody who meetsyou wants to kill you.
- Donkey: Oh, Shrek. Don't worry. Things just seem bad becauseit's dark and rainy and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman towhack you.
- Donkey: Ooh, I love Mexican food!
- Donkey: Pray for mercy, from Puss!
- Donkey: Real smooth, Shrek. "I'm an ogre!"
- Donkey: Say something crazy... like you're wearing ladiesunderwear.
- Donkey: Shrek and I drank this potion and now... we'resexy!
- Donkey: Then this fool went off and had a party, and they allstarting trying to pin a tail on me. Then they all got drunk, andstarted hitting me with sticks, yelling "Piñata! Piñata!" What thehell is a piñata, anyway?
- Donkey: You're supposed to say "You have the right to remainsilent!". No one said I have the right to remain silent!
- Donkey: [after turning back into a donkey] Aaaaaaw.
- Donkey: [carriage runs over Donkey] Oh, God! help me, please!My racing days are over! I'm blind! I'm blind! Tell the truth. WillI ever be able to play the violin again?
- Donkey: [final line during the extra part in the credits] I'mgoing to have to get a job.
- Donkey: [happily] Donkey!
- Donkey: [repeatedly] Are we there yet?
- Donkey: [running ahead of giant gingerbread man] Run, run asfast as you can!
- Donkey: [to Puss-in-Boots] The position of annoying talkinganimal has been filled.
- Donkey: [to Puss] If we ever need an expert on lickingourselves, we'll give you a call.
- Fairy Godmother : I don't care whose fault this was, just getit sorted! And could someone please bring me something deep fatfried and smothered in chocolate...
- Fairy Godmother : Your fallen tears have called to me, so herecomes my sweet remedy. I know what every princess needs for her tolive life happily. With... just a wave of my magic wand yourtroubles will soon be gone. With a flick of the wrist in just aflash, you land a prince with a ton of cash, A high priced dressmade by mice no less! Some crystal glass pumps and almost dressed!Worries will vanish your soul will cleanse Confide in your very ownfurniture friends We'll help you set a new fashion trend! I'll makeyou fancy, I'll make you great! The kind of gal a prince would dateThey'll write your name on the bathroom wall MALE VOICE: For happyever after- give Fiona a call! A sporty carriage to ride in style.A sexy man-boy chauffer Kyle. Vanish your blemishes, tooth decay...celulite thighs will fade away A hool and a hey! Have a BichonFrise And oh, what the hey... have a Bichon Frise! Nip and tuckhere and there, to land that prince with the perfect hair. Lipstickliners, shadow blush! to get that prince with a sexy tush. Luckyday, hunk buffet For the lipstick a roll in the hay You can swoonon the moon with the prince to this tune Don't be drab, you'll befab Your prince will have rock-hard abs Cheese souflee Valentine'sDay? Have some chicken fricassee - chorus
- Fairy Godmother: I don't care whose fault this was, just get itsorted! And could someone please bring me something deep fat friedand smothered in chocolate...
- Fairy Godmother: Remember, happiness is just a teardropaway...
- Fairy Godmother: Your fallen tears have called to me, so herecomes my sweet remedy. I know what every princess needs for her tolive life happily. With... just a wave of my magic wand yourtroubles will soon be gone. With a flick of the wrist in just aflash, you land a prince with a ton of cash, A high priced dressmade by mice no less! Some crystal glass pumps and almost dressed!Worries will vanish your soul will cleanse Confide in your very ownfurniture friends We'll help you set a new fashion trend! I'll makeyou fancy, I'll make you great! The kind of gal a prince would dateThey'll write your name on the bathroom wall MALE VOICE: For happyever after- give Fiona a call! A sporty carriage to ride in style.A sexy man-boy chauffer Kyle. Vanish your blemishes, tooth decay...celulite thighs will fade away A hool and a hey! Have a BichonFrise And oh, what the hey... have a Bichon Frise! Nip and tuckhere and there, to land that prince with the perfect hair. Lipstickliners, shadow blush! to get that prince with a sexy tush. Luckyday, hunk buffet For the lipstick a roll in the hay You can swoonon the moon with the prince to this tune Don't be drab, you'll befab Your prince will have rock-hard abs Cheese souflee Valentine'sDay? Have some chicken fricassee - chorus
- Gingerbread Man : Fire up the ovens, Muffin Man! We got a bigorder to fill.
- Gingerbread Man : It looks like we're up chocolate creekwithout a Popsicle stick!
- Gingerbread Man : IT'S A THONG!
- Gingerbread Man : IT'S ALIVE!
- Gingerbread Man: Fire up the ovens, Muffin Man! We got a bigorder to fill.
- Gingerbread Man: It looks like we're up chocolate creek withouta Popsicle stick!
- Gingerbread Man: IT'S A THONG!
- Gingerbread Man: IT'S ALIVE!
- Girl #1: I can be your true love!
- Girl #1: You look tense. Do you need me to rub yourshoulders?
- Girl #2: I can be your true love!
- Girl #2: I wanna rub his shoulders!
- Girl #3: I can be true... enough!
- Girl #3: Now I don't have anything to rub!
- King : Fiona!
- King : I only did that because I love her!
- King : Indeed! I had just started eating.
- King : Oh, no, no. Of course not! That's assuming you don't eatyour own young.
- King : So I suppose any grandchildren I could expect from youwould be...
- King: Ah, yes! Very good, uh... Carry on, Cedric.
- King: Ah, yes, um... Mmm, exquisite. What do you call thisdish?
- King: Fiona!
- King: I only did that because I love her!
- King: Indeed! I had just started eating.
- King: Oh, no, no. Of course not! That's assuming you don't eatyour own young.
- King: So I suppose any grandchildren I could expect from youwould be...
- Mongo, Mongo: [drowning] Be good.
- Pig : I see London, I see France...
- Pig: I see London, I see France...
- Pinocchio : I am not.
- Pinocchio : I most certainly am not.
- Pinocchio : I'm a real boy!
- Pinocchio : Shrek? Donkey?
- Pinocchio : Um, ok. I'm wearing ladies underwear.
- Pinocchio : What should I say?
- Pinocchio : [nose extends] .
- Pinocchio : [silence]
- Pinocchio: I am not.
- Pinocchio: I most certainly am not.
- Pinocchio: I'm a real boy!
- Pinocchio: Shrek? Donkey?
- Pinocchio: Um, ok. I'm wearing ladies underwear.
- Pinocchio: What should I say?
- Pinocchio: [nose extends] .
- Pinocchio: [silence]
- Prince Charming : Honeymoon? With whom?
- Prince Charming : Oh, thank heavens! Where is she?
- Prince Charming : Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away,the king and queen were blessed with a beautiful baby girl, andthroughout the land everyone was happy, until the sun went down,and they saw that their daughter was cursed with a frightfulenchantment that took hold each and every night. Desperate, theysought the help of a fairy godmother, who had them lock the youngprincess away in a tower, there to await the kiss of the handsomePrince Charming. It was he who would chance the perilous journeythrough blistering cold and scorching desert, traveling for manydays and nights, risking life and limb to reach the dragon's keep,for he was the bravest, and most handsome in all the land, and itwas destiny that his kiss would break the dreaded curse. He alonewould climb to the highest room of the tallest tower to enter theprincess's chambers, cross the room to her sleeping silhouette,pull back the gossamer curtains to find her- gasp!
- Prince Charming : Princess... Fiona?
- Prince Charming : Yes, cherry flavored. Want a taste?
- Prince Charming: Honeymoon? With whom?
- Prince Charming: Oh, thank heavens! Where is she?
- Prince Charming: Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away,the king and queen were blessed with a beautiful baby girl, andthroughout the land everyone was happy, until the sun went down,and they saw that their daughter was cursed with a frightfulenchantment that took hold each and every night. Desperate, theysought the help of a fairy godmother, who had them lock the youngprincess away in a tower, there to await the kiss of the handsomePrince Charming. It was he who would chance the perilous journeythrough blistering cold and scorching desert, traveling for manydays and nights, risking life and limb to reach the dragon's keep,for he was the bravest, and most handsome in all the land, and itwas destiny that his kiss would break the dreaded curse. He alonewould climb to the highest room of the tallest tower to enter theprincess's chambers, cross the room to her sleeping silhouette,pull back the gossamer curtains to find her- gasp!
- Prince Charming: Princess... Fiona?
- Prince Charming: Yes, cherry flavored. Want a taste?
- Princess Fiona : Dad!
- Princess Fiona : Is that glitter on your lips?
- Princess Fiona : Mum!
- Princess Fiona : Shrek!
- Princess Fiona : Shrek, please!
- Princess Fiona : Shrek?
- Princess Fiona: Dad!
- Princess Fiona: Is that glitter on your lips?
- Princess Fiona: Mum!
- Princess Fiona: Shrek!
- Princess Fiona: Shrek, please!
- Princess Fiona: Shrek?
- Puss-in-Boots : And Donkey!
- Puss-in-Boots : Dare to fear... Puss In Boots.
- Puss-in-Boots : En garde!
- Puss-in-Boots : Fear me, if you dare.
- Puss-in-Boots : For you, Baby, I could be.
- Puss-in-Boots : Hairball...
- Puss-in-Boots : Hey, boss. Let's shave him.
- Puss-in-Boots : Hmmm... he sounds dreamy.
- Puss-in-Boots : I am puss... In boots...
- Puss-in-Boots : I hate Mondays.
- Puss-in-Boots : I must hold on before I too go mad.
- Puss-in-Boots : Oh, the rich king? Sí.
- Puss-in-Boots : Pray for mercy from Puss... in boots.
- Puss-in-Boots : Sorry. I thought that question was directed atme.
- Puss-in-Boots : Today, I repay my debt...
- Puss-in-Boots : Too late.
- Puss-in-Boots : Um... that's... not mine...
- Puss-in-Boots : What Kind?
- Puss-in-Boots : Whatever happens... I must not... cry...
- Puss-in-Boots : You still look like an ass to me!
- Puss-in-Boots : [to Shrek] I too was concocting this very sameplan, already our minds are becoming one!
- Puss-in-Boots : [trying to convince Shrek not to neuter him]Please, no, por favor, por favor, please no, I implore you. I wasdoing it for my family! My mother she's sick and my father he livesoff the garbage. The king offered me much money and I have a littlebrother...
